10. Patrick Henry's oft misquoted remark, "Give me quicksand or give me death!"

9. When Columbus discovered America, he wasn't looking for spice. Queen Isabella had sent him off in search of more quicksand.

8. All those missionaries going to Africa and South America? Bingo. Quicksand seekers.

7. Squanto only befriended the pilgrims as he wanted some new women to sketch sinking into quicksand.

6. Secret Dead Sea Scroll commanding one's wife must cleave unto the quicksand.

5. Betsy Ross's original version of the American flag featured a big busted colonist in quicksand, with message, "Don't Tread on Me", but was deemed too racy.

4. Wheel only invented as a way to reach quicksand faster.

3. Merlin's best trick, turning the ground under Guinnevere into quicksand at moment's notice.

2. June 19, 1967: Steven Fenn discovers formula for artificial quicksand. When he goes to apply for the patent, he and the formula mysteriously disappear. The government, of course, insists this is simply another conspiracy rumor. You be the judge.

1. Eve? Oh yeah, she was into *total* submersion.


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THIS PAGE CREATED ON SEPTEMBER 29, 1997

1997 Kaol